Good Morning Leaving A Legacy Friends!

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@ http://www.angietolpin.com

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 Our hope and prayer is that we can minister to Marriages and families...
through focusing on leaving intentional legacies!
Come join me!

Blessings,

Angie Tolpin

The Most Important Legacy...

What is the most important Legacy you want to leave your children?

Have you thought about it?  I have been thinking about this a lot.  It is very obvious for me to "label" the legacy

...Faith...

but the next question I asked myself is where I have been re-evaluating...

How do I spend my time with my children?  

Since I home educate, I have all day everyday with my sweet blessings; but how much of my time is spent delighting in the Lord?  Soaking up His Word?  Do my Kids interrupt my Alone time with God?  Do they see my time as a cherished time mommy is having with God? What stumbling blocks are in my way or do I think are in my way of preventing me to meet God everyday... during the day... while my kids are with me?  

If I beleive the most important legacy I could leave my children is faith and relationship with Jesus Christ... how often am I modeling my faith and relationship for them to see?  How often am I leading them into a deeper relationship with Christ, beyond doing the Bible Curiculum, or doing devotions at dinner because its our family routine.  I'm not saying those things are bad... we need to be intentional about learning the word of God and teaching our Children God is in EVERYTHING... every subject in school.  I have just been thinking about how I model my walk with God on a daily basis.  I Love to serve out of obedience... I work hard every day and I diligently teach my children to work hard serving one another as well... however does the Martha in me consume my day... or do I make being a "Mary" and going to the feet of the Cross when I start getting tired a visible daily occurence.  I model for my girls,  being "busy in the home" because it is what we are called and blessed to do, but as a mom who loves Jesus, we also need and should yearn for time reading the Word of God, his letter to us, and model that desire.  

Well the hard truth is simple... 

If we aren't modeling that yearning for Christ and making time for Him, even randomly daily, little spits of time here and there... keeping our Bibles open on the counter... and every second we have a chance glances at this love letter that gives so much wisdom.  

If we aren't doing it...

Well maybe its because that yearning isn't really alive in our hearts to begin with?

We can't fake it with kids.

They see it all, the good, the bad, & the ugly.

Do they see you yearning for Jesus every chance you get as if it were your power source or your living water?

Are We What We Eat?

We've all heard the old adage, "You Are What You Eat."

While that statement isn't literally true, there is much truth to the fact that what we eat effects how we feel, it effects our health, and it effects our self image indirectly & for some of us directly.

I want to address 2 things in this post.

1) What we are feeding our families is leaving a legacy or creating habits in our children.

2)We have to be wary of allowing an extreme view of food to become an idol in our homes.

Habits are formed in our children, even without trying.  What ever we do on a regular basis has potential for becoming a "habit" or legacy.  For example, we juice and or make a smoothie with herbs, every day.  Yep, everyday! When I first started this journey of juicing, it was hard to get over the work involved, cutting the veggies and fruit, cleaning the machine, and then there was the grocery bill (out the roof with organic yummies).  But as we stuck with it, it just became part of our way of life, part of our schedule.  It became a habit.  Will my children do it when they grow up?  Probably some of them, its hard to see now.  

For some, eating fast food on a daily basis can be the habit.  Others, might only make everything from scratch.  Which ever applies to you, we all need to be aware that we are teaching our children by our example, what is acceptable and what attitudes towards food are acceptable.  

We all need to be careful not to allow our dietary philosophies and conviction to become an idol.  God warns us, in his good book against having idols and against disputing over things such as food, because it is not an eternal issue.  Our diet should never prevent us from fellowship with others.  When we teach our children we can only eat a certain way, and cater to that diet, they never learn how to be gracious and polite about "trying" and eating someone else's food... its a simple way to teach your child about having respect.  

For example, we have a few kiddos with food intolerances, some more severe than others.  There was a time when we needed to detox, so I was pretty strict about their diets, but within that time I also found how difficult it was to have fellowship (over meals) with people.  Our commitment is to God, and to living healthy to treat our bodies as holy temples, so we can serve Him more actively.  

"Be not among drunkards or among gluttonous eater of meat..." Prov 23:20Here God likens gluttony to drunkenness... pretty serious.

"The one who keeps the law is a son with understanding, but a companion of gluttons shames his father."  Prov. 28:7

"They have made me jealous with what is no god; they have provoked me to anger with their idols.So I will make them jealous with those who are no people; I will provoke them to anger with a foolish nation." Deuteronomy 32:21

"Now concerning food offered to idols: we know that "all of us possess knowledge." This "knowledge" puffs up, but love builds up. " 1 Cor. 8:1

As parents the habits we are teaching our children in regards to food can create idols, even for them, so we need to be on guard.  We don't want to leave a legacy of idols, do we.  On the other hand, how we feed our children also creates healthy eating habits or well no awareness.  When we don't teach awareness, and we may not even be eating unhealthy, really... that as well can lead to unhealthy habits. 

The point is this, what are we teaching our children... is there a balance of healthy awareness and conviction not to be a glutton... but a careful sensitivity to not allowing judgementalism or idols to be bred in our childrens' hearts as well.

What we eat and Teach is accpetable to Eat Leaves a Legacy!

Leaving A Legacy of Health

This could potentially be a controversial post.  Many people's ideas of what is "healthy" vary so drastically, so bare with me.  The basic concept is this...  What habits we currently model for our children on a day to day basis in the areas of exercise, food and dietary choices, medicinal preferences, and even mental health (staying stimulated and not going stagnate) are imprinting in them habits and what they envision themselves doing when the grow up.  

Today I am going to tackle the topic of exercise, if you never exercise... then your children are most likely not going to envision themselves exercising as an adult...  this kind of legacy can be dangerous to their health as it is dangerous to ours.  Believe me this is a super convicting post- I am a work in progress- but especially in this area of my life.  Unfortunately, it took me "sacrificing" my health in the name of caring for my family (really, making an idol out of my family in a way), thinking they were more important than taking care of myself... and in my mind of course my children are, but if I don't take care of myself, how can I take care of them.  This became a huge reality for me these past 2 pregnancies when I found myself on bed-rest.  I'm not saying that my being on bed-rest was all my fault, because I didn't exercise, but I will say that I might not be struggling as much as I do with all the symptoms I have if I would have made exercise a priority vs an option. 

I think there is a problem among mother's today... "A Motherhood Martyr Myth!"
Or maybe its just me, in which case this post is more of a confession. 
I used to think that I was a bad mom if I ever left my children, even to go to the doctor or to exercise.
I was constantly struggling in my mind because I already felt like I didn't have enough hours in the day to get everything I needed to get done with my kids and home, let alone, taking off to exercise.  Then there is justifying paying someone to help take care of the precious ones while I exercise. 
It seemed like such a "waste" of money, which furthered my guilt.
 I am currently still in healing from this very oppressive thinking that you are the only one that should ever and only be with your children. 
I personally am a healthier mommy, when I am able to get a serious focused exercise break in a couple times every week. 

So what we have found works for our family is this...

2 days a week: I go to a gym that has a pool to do water therapy &/or strengthening exercises (weights)
I usually take Kelsey my oldest with me at least 1 day/week for her to learn how to use a gym and so we can have fun doing it together.  This has also been a real productive time for my spirit to be filled... with technology devices today, I have been fortunate enough to take advantage of listening to sermons and talks as well as worship... which feeds my soul and helps me be a better mom during the rest of the week.
Then 2-3 days per week the kids and I have an exercise program we go through in our little at home gym... I rotate kids on bike/tread climber/ tumbling mat with our musical instruments and Taebo for kids video.  It is fun!  Definitely productive and helps get the wiggles out of my boys. 
As for the other days of the week... the kids do swimming lessons 2 days per week and we have a small farm with lots of physical work!  :)

Every family's convictions on this topic are so different, so please don't think you need to do it all like us.  This is just what works for our family after much trial and error!


What does your family's physical life look like?

Leaving A Legacy of Work Ethic

One of the Legacies I find myself very passionate about is Work Ethic.  Something desperately wrong has happened to the youth of today.  It's called low expectations on the parts of parents and the fulfillment of those low expectations by their children.  Isaac and I went to a seminar years ago called the Household of Strength by Gregg Harris, where he talked about this concept in great depth.  As Isaac and I sat there listening we were getting fired up, because we had so many conversations about this exact issue.  We had decided years ago that we want to Leave a Legacy of strong work ethic which ultimately comes from having a vision for what you are accomplishing and an innate drive to compel you to take action and get it done.
I personally believe that work ethic is not something that is taught, it is caught... just like the love for reading, compassion, and so much more.

In order to teach work ethic, well you need to have some yourself, right???

Proverbs 21:25-26 says this:

"The desire of a lazy man kills him.  For his hands refuse to labor.  He covets greedily all day long, But the righteous gives and does not spare."

So what are some practical ways we like to practically teach work ethic?  

Well we don't give allowance.  Personal preference here, but we feel that the kids are part of a family unit, a team.  If we all make a mess, then we all work diligently to get the mess picked up and then we can all enjoy the next activity together.  We have taught our children that in life God gives us the gifts of "jurisdictions" in our life and as we show him (and our parents) we are "responsible" with little, we are then given greater responsibilities.  With greater responsibilities comes greater privileges.  What are some privilege's???  Staying up a little later is one example.  Now, don't get me wrong... we desire our children to understand how to handle money wisely (another post), so we do have extra chores they can do to make a little Dough!  $$$

One Tolpin Family Motto is this:  

"Work Hard, Play Hard"

The Motto is all fine and dandy, but your kids needs to see you work.  

Practice what you preach... don't just have them do our weeding... go outside and weed with them. We pay $.01 per weed with roots and certain days I surprise the kids with double days or double hour and they can make more.  I find that the kids are eager to get there "responsibilities finished if they know they can look forward to earning money  by doing the extra jobs.  

Leaving a Legacy of Purposefully Working Hard & with the Right Attitude

If I grumble and complain while I do the dishes, how can I expect my children to do it with any better of an attitude.  We have to be modeling the right heart attitudes and teaching them the "Reasons behind WHY we do these things."

What Legacy Are You Leaving?

Our decisions, our training & discipleship, our passion, our purpose-fullness or lack there of, our work ethic, our political beliefs, our personal philosophies, our discipline or lack there of, our selfishness and sin, our mistakes, our conflict strategies (anger & intimidation/manipulation/interrogation/aloof judgement), our expectations, our lifestyle, our priorities, our "realness" or facade, our faith or lack there of; all these things and so much more play a part in the legacy we leave in our children.

As parents, we are imprinting what "parenting and marriage"look like in our childrens' subconscience and conscience minds.  We are their example (or role model) for how a parent is supposed "parent"and how an adult Christian is supposed "worship or pray or obey" Christ. We are their example of how to treat others with love & respect. How to practice Patience, Integrity, and Self-Control. We teach them frugality or frivaliousness.  We teach them to be concerned about the heart or to be consumed with outward appearances. We teach them how to treat friends and how to be "real."  We teach them to LEAD or Conform and Follow. Our marriage and how we treat our spouse models to our children so many different things.  It models what we beleive about Biblical Manhood & Womanhood, it models real life examples of how marriages interact and treat one another, we model how to resolve conflict, how to work as a team.  We model the good, the bad and the ugly of every area of life... dont' we.  We have an incredibly important duty & privilege.  To "help" mold the future generations, you hear this all the time.  Teachers motto is teaching the "next generation."  Parents, you still have the most influence.  You were chosen to be the parent.  Not the teacher, youth pastor, or coach.  You were given this precious gift in your child. 

  How serious are you going to take your responsibility? 

Feeling the pressure yet?  Isn't it HEAVY!  Fortunately, for us all, there is a God who is full of grace & more sufficient than necessary for redeeming our children, even with all of our mistakes and sins.  Jesus is full of Grace for us and the mistakes we make, but he can redeem them and use even our sins to bring forth fruit.  As we humbly come to Jesus, aware of our mistakes and repent.  And as we take our relationships with our children seriously enough to be humble and apologize, teaching them about the sin of even our hearts.  We are teaching them self-control, kindness, humility, forgiveness, and grace.  

Come Back again soon as I will be posting more ideas on the Leaving a Legacy. 

Getting Ready to Make New Friends

I'm so excited I can hardly wait... in a just a few short weeks I will be in PA @ the Relevant Conference 2011!  My sweet hubbie, Isaac surprised me with a ticket the other day!  This will be my first time traveling across states by myself in YEARS! So in an attempt to get to know some of the other purposefully bloggin' mamas going this year, this post is a little scrapbook look into my life.

(photo is a year old- sorry)

What is the Vision for Leaving a Legacy?

Leaving a Legacy

As parents, we are all leaving a legacy.  Whether we recognize or not, we are leading our children, helping to "shape" them if you will.  It can be a scary, and awakening reality when you think about the responsibility.  Or it can be an exciting challenge that brings more purposefulness to your "everydays" with your children.  The empowering truth, is that God is the creator of life and of families.  He choose you to be your child's parent.  When I get overwhelmed by the task at hand, I find encouragement and grace in that simple fact.

Jeremiah 1:5

⁵ “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
   before you were born I set you apart;
   I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.” 

This passage teaches that God loves and has a purpose for us even before we're born--that from the very beginning of our lives, God has a unique plan for us. It's not just true for us parents as individuals, but also for our children.  And God choose you to be the parent of your son or daughter.  He has confidence in you as a parent... but you have to trust Him and allow Him to speak to you and guide in the decisions you make as a parent.  

I hope you will join me on this journey of discovering what it means to Purposefully Leave a Legacy

Socialization? To School or Not to School?

I was recently inspired to blog about the whole "Socialization" controversy that tends to "attack" home schooling families.  Its always funny to me when I get asked why do we home school?  I have to laugh; because, if you have home schooled for any amount of time at all... boy... that question is opening a whole can of worms... isn't it!  It is not a simple answer, at all.  In fact, its probably one of the hardest questions my husband and I have ever made... or at least it seemed like it at the time.  Now home schooling is just our way of life.  It's part of our family culture... part of our identity if you will.  

So to start of this concise opinion on socialization here is my disclaimer... remember this is merely my opinion, based on observation, experience, research & reading... but still just my opinion.

Here's the definition of Socialization from Dictionary.com:

so·cial·i·za·tion

Thriving Marriages & Thriving Businesses:Part 6

Compartmentalizing Life? Aren't We a Team?

What is it?  He has his job, you have your job.  He has his responsibilities, you have yours.  He has his "jurisdictions," you have yours.  He has his side of the closet, you have yours.  He goes to work, its his deal, what does it have to do with you?  You have your work (even if it is in the home), what does it have to do with him?  Get the picture?  

Couples throughout the generations have been married and landed into categories similar to these: 

They have either Thrived, Survived, or Failed.  

They either experienced the thrill of the journey of marriage, or stayed contentedly married, or they have gotten divorced, or stayed married but experienced a stagnate or unfulfilled, maybe even depressing marriage.  

What sets "thriving marriages" apart from "surviving marriages"  or "failing"marriages?

The Wrestling in My Soul

For some time now, there has been a wrestling in my soul.
At times the restlessness looks like disappointment, at times frustration, at times lack of confidence, lack of concentration because I get so distracted by what I think I should be pursueing, uncertainty of what God has planned for me. My greatest personal desire in life, aside from all the "motherly hopes and dreams" one has for her children, is to be obedient to Christ and to take ACTION for Him. I want my life to count for something, don't we all. Not for me, but for Christ. God created us all for individual purposes, I REALLY have an aching desire to fulfill the reasons He made me. Don't you?

Personally, I don't want to wake up and regret my life or feel the empty burden of feeling like I could've, should've, but didn't. You know when you life comes to that place where you can either step out, do what's hard, really hard, make the sacrifices, not knowing what the outcome will be, but being true to who you are, who God made you to be and gifted you as or you can just do what's normal, what you have always done, and dream and kind of pursue, but not really.

Not really give it your all because you are simply AFRAID.

Courageous

Just watched this movie... it is out this weekend in Portland... check out the website here...
Courageous

If we all go to the movie... it will get to be in more cinemas... it all depends on this weekend!

Kids Consignment Sale

Your Kids to My Kids

Leaving a Legacy: Teaching our kids about Pregnancy and Childbirth

Leaving a Legacy: Teaching our kids about Pregnancy and Childbirth

Get Wisdom

Get Wisdom
by Ruth Younts

This is such a sweet little devotional handbook on the topic of God's Wisdom.
One of my favorite things is finding new devotionals to teach the kids about our Lord Jesus. This little book is so handy at lunch time or whenever for teaching on a topic like "Mercy" or "Obedience." You can read it directly and ask the heart probing questions, have a child read the bible verse and pray together, or you can take it and expand on it.

Just thought I would share this great resource!
God Bless!
Go to Get Wisdom for more info or Christianbook.com has it for $7.19

CAUGHT NOT TAUGHT- THE LOVE FOR READING

"CAUGHT NOT TAUGHT"

That's right... Reading time! As a home school mother I have been convicted lately and I thought I would share. As I have been planning the new years activities, curriculum and those sort of things... I felt a conviction to change up the schedule. You see while we read a ton at our house... there hasn't ever been a need for a "scheduled time where everyone just sits down to read for a chunk of time, all at once. I usually find my reading time early in the morning or late at night after most of my chores are done... which isn't every day... depending on how the day went. Got to be flexible over here at the Tolpin House since we've got 6 kids under 11 over here! :) It's a good challenge for a control- freak like me! The kids have reading time throughout the day. They read of course when they are doing school work and when we do our Bible time, stuff like that. And I have a daughter who is ADDICTED to reading, which is great except that when I need her to be helping with other things, she is usually off reading somewhere and then finds herself in trouble for reading... crazy isn't it... I know!
So I have been feeling a conviction for a while now to dedicate an hour to just reading. All of us at the same time. We can all be in the same room, but we don't have to. This is a separate time from doing our devotion time... it is dedicated to just reading... whatever they want to read. If they want to read the Bible more, great, that is FANTASTIC. But this way it will force me to read during the day with them.
One of my favorite quotes is this:
"It's CAUGHT, not TAUGHT"

Thriving Marriages Part 5: Lead Me

Lead Me

"I look around and see my wonderful life
Almost perfect from the outside
In picture frames, I see my beautiful wife
Always smiling, but on the inside

Oh, I can hear her saying

Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, but what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight
That I'm still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone

I see their faces, look in their innocent eyes
They're just children from the outside
I'm working hard, I tell myself they'll be fine
They're independent, but on the inside

Oh, I can hear them saying

Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight
That I'm still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone

So Father, give me the strength
To be everything I'm called to be
Oh Father, show me the way
To lead them

Won't You lead me?

To lead them with strong hands
To stand up when they can't
Don't want to leave them hungry for love
Chasing things that I could give up

I'll show them I'm willing to fight
And give them the best of my life
So we can call this our home
Lead me 'cause I can't do this alone

Father, lead me 'cause I can't do this alone"
by Sanctus Real

This song is amazing... It moves me... because from a Mother's perspective... I can not do it all myself... from a wife's perspective... yes of course there have been times when I've felt this way... yes even being married to my visionary husband who is so focused on productivity.
The point is, none of us are perfect. None of us can have that void in our souls filled by any other human or by any earthly thing or experience. Only Jesus Christ can fill us up and give us the supernatural strength to do "all we are called to do."

"Building Thriving marriages & Thriving Businesses Part 4:The Comparison Trap"

The Comparison Trap

We have all been there... that time old comparison trap... and aren't we women the WORST at it? Or maybe it just has the ability to eat us up more than men?
I'm sure you've all read the books on friendship that have chapters dedicated to "comparing" yourself to other women and how dreadfully dangerous that can be.
I know I have personally struggled with this one since I was a young girl in elementary school. I would sit in my desk hearing the "whanwhanwhan" Charlie Brown noise the teacher would make... and my mind would be off in the distance... doing that "inner talking" even in pre-k and kindergarten... that inner talking would begin and my confidence would diminish. As a young growing lady... in Jr.high... that inner talking sounded like this... "is what I am wearing cute?"..."I want to be friends with her, but I don't think she would ever talk to me." You see it starts very young and surfacy; and then it grows into a beast, unless you tame it.

Joy for Resurrection Day!

Isaiah 53:3-12
"He was despised and rejected by men,
a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering...
Surely He took up our infirmities
and carried our sorrows
yet we considered him stricken by God,
smitten by him, and afflicted.
But he was pierced for our transgressions,
he was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was upon him,
and by his wounds we are healed...
By oppression and judgement he was taken away...
Yet it was the Lord's will to crush him and cause him to suffer,
and though the Lord makes his life a guilt offering...
and he will bear their iniquities...
because he poured out his life unto death and was numbered with transgressors.
For He bore the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.

John 1:29
"Behold the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world."

After he appeared to them he said,
"Peace be with you"
"Put your fingers here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe."
"Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed."
John 20:26-29

Hosanna! He is Risen! Jesus is Alive!
Let us not just celebrate an Easter Holiday or Tradition...
Let us embrace Jesus and be spiritually moved and grow by being overwhelmed by who He is and what He has done for us. Let us be transformed by the renewing of our minds in Christ Jesus Today!
May He Bless You All through Eternity!

Building Thriving Marriages & Thriving Businesses Part 3

Hospitality

One of the most obvious ways to be involved in your husband's business is through Hospitality. This message is for women, all women who are married, regardless of their husband's career choice. There is always some way we can reach out, if our husbands can get into the thought of "reaching out" to those God puts in their path on a daily basis. However, I must say that in our personal experience it has been easier to practice hospitality with NorPac since we get to attempt to create the culture. I know that certain professions may pose "significant obstacles" with this idea; however, my challenge would be to encourage each of us to look at the impact we are or are not having in our work place or husband's work place. I believe that if your husband is following God's calling on his life in regards to "what career path" he has chosen, then as a TEAM it is our responsibility to be purposeful on a daily basis to reach out in the name of Christ.
Our culture and world is a "busy" society that has too many activities scheduled and too many more important things to do. The majority of the culture, lives a life consumed by "doing" things that take them away from home so often they couldn't possibly have the time to have people over for dinner. We live in a self- indulged culture that doesn't take the "time" to bless others by having them to their homes. As a Christian, I believe that we are placed where we are for a reason. My husband is placed where he is for a reason. I highly doubt that from God's great omnipotent, omniscient perspective he thinks its "just" to make money. God has a bigger more eternal life plan! I would like to challenge you to ask yourself the question??? How are you playing your role in making impact in the lives of those God has naturally placed in your life, through your work or your husbands work??? Are you keeping your life Compartmentalized??? Balanced? More on this concept later!

Building A Thriving Marriage & A Thriving Business Part 2

Dispelling Yet Another Lie

Lie#2: People who have successful businesses must have sacrificed their marriage & family life or compromised something, somewhere

Truth: Some may have. Some will and some do, and they will struggle in their personal life because of their decisions and actions (in the Bible its called sowing & reaping). However, that doesn't have to be you. I don't believe God would ever ask you to sacrifice your marriage or family for a business.

Building A Thriving Marriage & A Thriving Business Part 1

Dispelling the Myth

Today I want to dispel the first of a few myths that I believe hurt businesses and marriages.

Lie #1: You can't have it all- A Thriving Marriage & A Thriving Business
Truth: A thriving marriage can help create a thriving business! No, a thriving business doesn't create a thriving marriage.
The obvious tip here is to be focused on creating a strong foundation for your marriage from the beginning. Create a Vision and Mission for you and your spouse to have as your driving force. The thing you look back to that keeps you moving forward together. For Isaac and I, it was our Faith in Christ and belief that He had created us for a purpose and put us together for a purpose. We don't personally believe we were created to just live here and indulge our own selfish desires (although we do struggle with selfishness like everyone else). Rather, we believe we were put here on earth for a reason and we try to stay purposefully productive towards fulfilling the tasks and visions the Lord lays on our hearts.

For years, I have had a heart for young women who are married and starting a business with there husbands. My desire is to see their marriages thriving, not surviving. To see them as a couple find their "place" in this world where they are feeling confidant they are giving their highest contribution to the world.

Why would anyone settle for a "surviving" marriage? Statistically, if over 50% of marriages end in divorce ... how many of those 50% left are really in love? Choosing to Love? Enjoying being married? 50 years down the road how many of those 50 % that are still married... have thriving marriages... not just surviving... not just "stayed together because we know divorce is wrong” or "for the kids" or dare I say it..." divorce is unbiblical." While those are good reasons to not get a divorce shouldn't we have a higher standard? I have a higher standard for my marriage. I want a thriving marriage in 50 years. One that is still on purpose and building something significant together. Yes, one of our purposes is to raise our children in a strong Christ centered home, but after the kids are grown, what next? I know... I can't wait! I know there are so many things Isaac and I feel "called" to do... ways to serve in this world...giving our greatest contribution possible with what we have been given. My prayer is that you have that standard as well!
Dream! Take Action! Having a marriage on Purpose doesn't just happen, it takes making a choice and staying committed to working at it. So build a strong foundation with a conviction for your future together. Build Your Marriage on a Solid Foundation.

Thriving Marriage & Thriving Businesses Series

I am excited to start this series which I am calling"Building Thriving Marriages & Thriving Businesses"
As many of you know, my husband has worked for Cutco for 16 years. That was how we meet. I worked for the company first as a sales rep and then after training to run my own office, Isaac and I were engaged so my focus changed and I became his main Assistant Manager. Together we built our first year round District Office.
Isaac and I really enjoyed building together! I will share more of our story in the first series post.

Over the years, we have seen many businesses thrive at the expense a marriage. We have also seen many businesses close down to save a marriage. We have also seen marriages and businesses get "stuck" in a stagnate place, where there is no growth = which equals, not much happiness. Running your own business is hard work, which requires sacrifice in certain seasons. We have had this experience first hand. Nothing worth having comes easy, including a strong marriage. You have to choose to work at it!
Now, running your own business is not for everyone. I believe God is the perfect Creator/ Designer, and He has made everyone unique. We are not all "made" to be business owners. This series set is for those who are running businesses or thinking of doing it. I hope that I can share what I have experienced and observed over the years to encourage you and your business & marriage.

Come join me, starting Monday Feb 28!

Pick Pocket Molly

Are you into REUSEING, REDUCING, & RESALE

If so, then a Pick Pocket Molly Event is for You!
Come join us for the first event April 1-3!

What is this event???
Have you heard of a Pass it on Sale for Kids clothing???
Pick Pocket Molly is a similar event, but for us moms- well all women!
Pick Pocket Molly is a fun way for women to resell their clothing for a good price and find good deals shopping! Lets face it, as Moms, we don't have a ton of time to put into shopping... but if you sign up as a consignor you can sell some of your old duds, clean out your closet, and make some cash to fund buying new clothes!
If you have a hard time getting out you can shop online as well
here

What can you sell???
Women's Clothes (Maternity as well), Coats, Shoes, Jewelry, Purses, Belts, Hats, and all kinds of other Accessories!
They are also featuring Lamps this Month!
To Sign up as a Consignor go here

If you don't want to get money for your clothes you can also "donate" them.

Pick Pocket Molly Donates to Women's Ministries:
5% to Bethany House
5% to Rapha House in Southeast Asia
to find out more go here

I am very excited to share with you this awesome event, which my very good friend
Alice Behnke has created with her husband Chris Behnke. Alice has style and has a standard for modesty, which I also love.
Yes, You can be dressed modest and still look cute!

After all I want my husband to love the way I dress...
I don't dress for the world ... I dress first for my Lord (modestly)... and next for my husband! This is a great way to mix up our closets without having to shop all over town, make some money, and get rid of some of the clothes we outgrew after having six babies (lol), like me!

Hope to see you at the event!

Visit the Pick Pocket Molly website:
www.pickpocketmolly.com

Living on a Mission

Every year people make New Year's Resolutions.
I've made them in the past and I am sure you've probably made them as well.
Two years ago I got on a mission about not making New Year's Resolution's but reflecting on my life and being honest. Truly honest... about my relationships, physical health, spiritual life, marriage, parenting, nutritional habits, financial goals. Some areas were more encouraging and exciting to evaluate than others of course, but so healthy to take time and reflect.
Since we were married, eleven years ago Isaac and I have enjoyed brainstorming sessions twice a year... maybe more... once on our anniversary and once around New Years. We have gone back and forth over the years with having a mission statement for our family/marriage and then goals & actions steps for accomplishing those goals in the different areas of life (marriage, spiritual, family, education, financial, business, etc...). It is stimulating for our marriage to be "building" something together and I can not tell you how helpful it for me mentally and being able to support my husband in his businesses and vision for our life and family. I feel like we are a team and I feel more "on mission or on purpose" with our ideas, dreams and goals laid out. Its a chance for us to share our hearts with each other and support one another in prayer. Its also so fun to look back on previous years goals and see God's faithfulness in our lives.
So this year I have been anticipating this time with Isaac. I recently came across this awesome help for accomplishing what we normally do, but in a more organized manner. (For any of you who know me well, you know how much I LOVE organizing things.) Ann Dunagan @ Harvest Ministry is offering a FREE 2011 New Year's Guide! Two things I really like the most... (1) The focus of being Mission-Minded (Great Commission) as you are evaluating your life... this is a different aspect I am personally excited to focus more on! (2) She has thought provoking questions and an evaluation chart to fill out as you reflect upon the previous year.


I am excited to hear what you New Year Goals are for 2011! Please share and leave me a comment!

Funny Faces

The pictures speak for themselves!

Merry Christmas!

May you day be filled with love & special memories be made!
May Jesus be Glorified and Praised in your Homes and Hearts today!

"She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins." Matthew 1:21
Merry Christmas!
From the Tolpin Family

December Home School...

December at the Tolpins

Many people have been asking me what we do for home school the month of December...
A typical December at our house looks like this:
We take the month off from most "typical school subjects" to learn more about Jesus, focus on Jesus, celebrate Jesus, and bless family and friends through hospitality & special gift making.

I am a CRAFT ADDICT... I love doing hands on activities with the kids so here are some
Gift Making for Kids...
Here are a few ideas of things we have done this year...
If your family sorry if you see your gift before Christmas...
but so many friends have been asking for ideas...

Painting Terra Cotta Flower pots for those garden enthusiasts in the family! Ceramic Coasters from the ceramic cafe... each kid paints one! So much fun!Drew made ceramic magnets! Mix, bake, paint!
Megan painted a glass picture frame~

The big kids embroidered towels! Yep even boys need to know how to sew!
Little ones Painting Wooden treasures from Craft store!







Babies helped me make special memories plaques!

Drew made Luke a yellow ducky for Christmas! All the kids enjoyed candle making & soap making~





Other gift ideas we have made successfully:
~Harvesting herbs and giving them in beautiful green glass bottles bought from Mountain Rose Herb Store. Lavender, Chamomile, Rosemary, Dill, Thyme, Oregano & Peppermint are our favorites for cooking and teas!
~Making bracelets, key chains out of bottle caps
~ Magnet making
~Making Coasters with Modge Podge
~Photo crafts such as calenders, mouse pads, mugs, ornaments, magnets,etc...
~Making cement mosaic stepping stones
~knitting scarves
~pot holder loom kit
~tie-knot blankets
~sewing baby doll blankets
~cookie, muffin, soup mixes in a jar- we have been making these for years for neighbors... since before I had kids and people LOVE them
~Cookies in a tin can of course!
~ Canvas painting for Grandparents
~Potpourri Sachets

Many ideas come from just walking through the craft store. So when all else fails I go there and walk around to get ideas. Some great websites for activities if you don't want to put the craft supplies together.... Creativity for Kids & of course Timberdoodle has boxed craft ideas too!

May you, as a mother embrace the time you have with your kids and enjoy them as you create together...

Getting Ready for NorPac Christmas Party

Last friday was our annual NorPac Christmas Party! We started out the day finishing making dessert & appetizers! Here are the boys helping us make some choco crunch treats & almond bark... super fast easy and yummy treat for little ones to help with!


Choco Crunch Treats:
equal parts milk chocolate chips & butterscotch chips- melted...
stir in crunchy chow mein noodles and drop on wax paper to harden!

Almond Bark:
Roast Almonds... melt chocolate chips over med low heat.... spread almonds out on cookie sheet and pour chocolate over top... let it harden then break into pieces...so good! Thanks Keziah for showing us how to make the bark!


Other desserts & appetizers we made for party:
Christmas cookies... Mint fudge... Fondue Fountain... deviled eggs (my fav)... famous meatballs...
cheese plater... and more! Thanks to All that Jazz Catering I didn't have to cook dinner this year! What a nice break! The food was awesome... and so nice to not have to do it all!

Productive Play

Toys for Birthdays, Toys for Christmas,

Toys for Education???

After being at the local toy store and being over whelmed by the quantity of junk they call toys as well as the lack of quality toys I have decided to awaken my blog from a deep sleep.

Toys, there are many different ideas and theories out there about them. In sharing some I have encountered, you may be surprised. Hopefully challenged and led to think deeply about what toys you are purchasing this holiday season!

When I first got married, I thought, we wouldn't "waste" money on toys! Have you ever thought that? Wow have we come a long way! Then as my daughter got older, I was introduced to the idea that "a child's play is their work." Wanting to "invest" in their education and keep the children stimulated I decided to try to purchase and encourage family members to give gifts that were proper play that would also educate.

Then as the family grew larger and the amount of toys grew larger, I wanted to simplify... so we buckled down and donated massive quantities of toys. It felt so good! And it forced me to have to start putting tools in my children's hands more often, rather than just toys. We're taking about a broom rather than a buzz lighter year action figure!

I have heard older women give talks on this topic, some even encouraging to not have any toys at all, rather have tools appropriate for children to use. Help them to contribute, be productive! Now, do my kids have toys? Oh yes they do! But the toys are a reward to be played with when their work is done.

Most of our toys (most of them) have purposes. I feel like I am constantly weeding out toys that seem to have no point-- as you know it could be a full time job. The kids are aware of their purposes. For example, stuffed animals... recently I heard a talk given on this topic of dolls vs. stuffed animals... I thought it was so insightful I want to share it with you.

In our current society there is a huge push for a humanistic view of animals. People view their dogs and cats as their children in some cases. Now, let me just say if I offend you here I am sorry... but dogs and cats aren't human. They are dogs and cats, not babies. We have a dog, we love Moses, but he is a dog. So lets relate stuffed animals to dolls in the same sense we do dogs to babies. Are they ok for kids to play with, for sure, but as a dog. If a child's play is their work, I believe it is also an element of education. I propose a child's every day play trains them for their every day life as an adult. If they play with stuffed animals as people, then there is a chance they will have a humanistic world view when they are older. If a little girl plays with a dolly, she is practicing being a mommy. If she plays "house," she is praticing being a home maker. If a boy starts making guns out of his legos its because God created little boys to grow into men who have an innate desire to protect and provide for a family; which is also a good thing.

So let me encourage you, as the holiday shopping begins, pray about what gifts you buy your children and other peoples children. Be purposeful and think about what the toy is really going to teach them. Is it going to teach them productive play or will it end up in next years donation box? I have been down this road enough times to know how easy it is to make mistakes in gift buying.

Here are a few websites to help you out:

Plus online shopping is so much faster and easier!

Timberdoodle

MindWare

Montessori Services

Magic Cabin

Vision Forum

Back to Basics

HearthSong

Lego.com

Lamplighter Books

Keepers of the Faith-- this is a new company I just discovered and LOVE it- go here first

These are the main companies we like to support and enjoy being blessed by the products they sell.